Te Rito Journalism Project
Alakihihifo Vailala
Growing up, Jonjon Tolovae says she always knew there was always something different about herself.
Public Interest Journalism funded through NZ On Air
“Reclamation” is how Jonjon Tolovae describes her journey as a young fa’afafine.
Growing up, Tolovae says she always knew there was always something different about herself.
“I was 11 or 12 when I actually figured out what it was and I had a name for it and it was gay.”
Leading up to telling her family, Tolovae says she was an “emotional wreck” especially growing up in a family with only four brothers.
“I dropped the news and my family was just laughing. They were like, ok and what else, are you going to jail?”
She says her family has been supportive and that her journey of transition has also been a journey for her family.
“It’s been a journey of reclaiming what’s mine. Reclaiming my identity, reclaiming myself and reclaiming my culture.”
“I think it was in 2022 when I realised this is who I really am. Especially when I came into the arts and I got to see people be themselves and I saw people that look like me.”
Tolovae is a creative at No.3 Roskill Theatre Company (No.3) based in Mount Roskill and is passionate about the arts.
“The arts saved my life because it gave me the power to share my story. It was a place that celebrated my being. It taught me that art is me and that I can be celebrated in all my truth.”
She mentions one of her pieces of theatre, Tama'ita'i which translates to girl in Samoan that was part of her company’s last theatre show for 2023.
“It was about where I see myself and where I fit in as a fa’afafine in my Samoan culture.”
“I think one of my favourite lines from the piece is with the roots of a teine (female) but the flower of a tama (male). I am the final form of a beautiful anufe (caterpillar).”
Tolovae says there needs to be more queer pacific people at the forefront of mobilising activism within the wider LGBTQ community.
She hopes that sexuality becomes less of a taboo topic within the pacific community and for more safe spaces for the pacific rainbow community.
“The closet is not a place where we thrive or where we exist because it’s made for clothes. It’s made for baggage. We’re not baggage, we’re the whole package.”
Hero image: Jonjon Tolovae is a creative at No.3 Roskill Theatre Company (No.3) Photo/ Supplied
